Friday, October 03, 2008

why am i having bar dreams NOW?

i didn't have any weird, panicky bar-related dreams between the test and the results coming out. i freaked out enough during my waking hours, but my sleep was my own. the anticipation and the nerves never seemed to follow me into dreamland.

it was only last night, after the bar results came out, that the bar first stalked me there.

i had a dream last night that i was at a meeting with my co-workers. we were congratulating each other for passing the bar. i was trying to put on a happy face and play along, but it was painful. it was painful because in the dream, i had received a message before the meeting that ibaby's first notice to me was in error, and that i had in fact failed the bar. there was one person who made an off-hand comment about how it wouldn't have been *that* bad if one of us had failed, because we could always take it again and we could keep working unless we failed it a second time...and i wanted to slink back into a corner until they were done talking about the bar.

i didn't quite believe that it was all a dream until i woke up, checked my email, and saw no "important message from ibaby" in my inbox.

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