Thursday, June 29, 2006

if only. if only.



i imagine a garden full of these miniaturized republicans, ripe for the picking.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Monday, June 26, 2006

because memes are fun...ganked from nicolae...

Reply to this entry with your name and post these instructions in your own journal. I will go poke around your list of interests on your profile and ask you one question about one of them. You wax rhapsodic on the subject of your interest for the edification of all and we'll learn something keen about you.
first of all...i saw this when i was searching on westlaw today. it amused me way more than it should.






keycite



secondly...i learned a fun fact today! around 1960, there was a gang called the Devil's Disciples, the direct forerunner of the Gangster Disciples. i'll give you one guess as to where on the South Side of Chicago the Devil's Disciples were centered.

if you answered "fifty-third and kimbark", you win the big prize!

*insert "The More You Know" clip here*

Sunday, June 25, 2006

craziest argument for creation ever, courtesy of Fundies Say The Darndest Things:

Did you know that all bulls are males? How can these bulls mate to have more bulls?
The cynical side of me is less than surprised that some team, somewhere, decided to do this, although it doesn't stop the fact that, now that it's reality, it makes me even more cynical and frustrated. Apparently, for the Colorado Rockies to want you to play baseball for them, you have to be a christian.

is it employment discrimination? i would think so...whether you're making five fifteen an hour or millions upon millions a season, to be ineligible because of your faith for a job that you could otherwise do is discriminatory. is it counterproductive? i think so...it would be like tom monaghan deciding that only christians could deliver pizza for domino's, shutting out otherwise qualified people who would be willing to do the job, because of a fundamentally private issue.

i didn't really have an opinion on the rockies before...they were that baseball team in colorado. now, though, i don't like them. i'm annoyed with them. there's no place for religious tests on the job, unless the job is some sort of religious staff in a specific faith's house of worship, for obvious reasons. to whom the players pray on their own time, or if they pray at all, is no one's issue but the players themselves. the job of a baseball owner is to run a baseball team, not a church.

and, on a lighter note...their proclamations of "hallelujah! we're .500!" do ring a little hollow.
dear law review editors,
it was ever-so-kind of you to send a big rejection letter out to the entire class, whether or not they tried to write on, whether or not they were accepted.
just know that i rejected you first by not even purchasing the write-on packet, much less deigning to try.
love,
me

p.s.: best wishes for the coming year.
i still don't know where i'm going to be living a week from now.

so stressed.

peachy. just bloody peachy.

Friday, June 23, 2006

i can't believe it's friday. i feel like i am going to have to go to work tomorrow...which is not true, although odds are i'll have to be there on sunday, just for a while. i've been so busy at work, but i love it. i love having a job that i care about.

although, i'm still too tired to write anything good right now.

tomorrow's the public transit scavenger hunt. :D i should do some brushing up on metro routes tonight, ways to get to certain landmarks, just in case that ends up being to some avail. i'm in it to win it, and i need my transit geekery to overcome my utter lack of knowledge of where anything is in this city.

finally, a survey ganked from squelch84:

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your LJ along with your 7 songs.

"Burnout" by 7G
"Maybe" by ADD
"Cold (But I'm Still Here)" by Evans Blue
"When The Lights Go Out" by Lazyeye
"Goodbye Earl" by Dixie Chicks
"Somewhere Only We Know" by Keane (i AM singing this song next week at karaoke--no ifs, ands, or petutes.)
"Back Home" by Cold

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

i know i've been delinquent this week, but i've been busy. busy and tired.

i still don't know where i'll be living as of July 1. i have a guy coming in to look at my place tomorrow. if he takes it, i can stay. if not, i'm probably going to have to move on July 1. move where? only the shadow knows.

i've been really busy at my jobs. the law is a demanding profession, to be sure. it's funny. every week we have a deadline, some brief or draft or motion is due. i'm sure it'll be a little easier on me once we turn it in, but of course, more deadlines pop up. it's like whack a mole, but i'm stretching my brain, and i'm helping people. it's busy, but i love it.

even my research assistant job...i'm to the point that i'm running around in circles, finding similar cases over and over again, but i'm proud i've gotten that far on the project. i enjoy it when i mine for language and find that one juicy, useful, interesting sentence hidden ever-so-well in a bunch of chaff.

i can't believe it's already wednesday. that's awesome, because it means tomorrow's karaoke night. i haven't decided what else i'm going to sing, but i do know one thing: i'll be darned if some moron who can't sing or keep a rhythm steals the chance to sing "not an addict" again this week. someone did that to me last week, called that song before i could, and just killed it. i'm calling that one first this week.

on a completely unrelated topic, i went grocery shopping today. i was such a dork, but i couldn't help it. i still think of things way too often in terms of chicago prices. this makes st. louis prices so enthralling, since they're so much cheaper. today, we bought a bunch of groceries...a big cartload of them. i pushed them up to the register and i couldn't even look at the register screen as the clerk was scanning in the groceries. i knew they'd be cheaper than the co-op...then again, a fur coat at neiman marcus is cheaper than a cartload of groceries at the co-op. still, i was bracing for a hundred and ten dollar or so hit to the wallet, for all the shopping we did.

i turned around to pay--and the cartload of groceries cost me sixty dollars. that even included the six dollar pack of stew meat...i don't understand why stew meat has to be angus beef, but they were out of normal stew meat and chris really wanted to make some stew soon. i was a little hesitant then, but when i saw how cheap everything else was, i couldn't bring myself to care all that much about the extravagant stew meat. i could not believe my eyes...i spent the entire ride home raving about the insanely cheap groceries.

this city truly is cheap! cheap! fun! fun!

Friday, June 16, 2006

stephen colbert continues to amaze me with his genius...and stupid people continue to amaze me with their...stupidity.

this time, he's got congressman lynn westmoreland from georgia, who's sponsoring a bill to put the ten commandments up in congress.

he claims we'd all be lost without the ten commandments.

and then...stephen colbert asks him to name the ten commandments.

hilarity ensues.

it's fantastic. he really needs to know his bills before a) sponsoring them or b) talking about them in public with one of the most incisive hosts on television.
ah. hatting, orly, and monocles. does the internet get any better than this little gif i found on a fark forum?

at least stanley paulson ingrained in me a deep love of poking fun at formalism.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

i know i've been utterly delinquent in my blogging this week...i've been a little off my rocker. i've been so busy at work, and whacked out about my embarrassing excuses for grades...it's a stressful week.

but, this...this was just scary. i don't know what to say, except that i'm really, unbelievably glad i don't work at leona's anymore. that location is the one where i worked last year, where i waitresssed...and some guys robbed the store after it closed, and shot a manager dead. i was watching the video on the trib website...i didn't know any of the people they were talking about, i didn't know the manager who was shot (he must have come in after i moved to st. louis)...but it was still scary, seeing the footage of the restaurant where i worked last year.

i think reading the article was even more harrowing. it talked about the robbers coming in through an unlocked back door, facing an alley, and demanding money from a manager counting it. that alley is "drug dealer alley"..."crack dealer alley"...the alley that ran right by my bedroom window last year. it was a dark alley, with people going up and down it all day and all night, the alley that motivated k&g (the most unmotivated landlords ever) to screw bars on our bedroom windows. i lived along that alley.

and, the door...whenever there were people in the restaurant, whether it was open or not, that door was unlocked. people would go in and out...to smoke, to arrive at work, to leave work, to escape from the oppressive heat of the kitchen area. right inside that door was dispatch. delivery is run from dispatch--and all the money was handled there. we went to dispatch to cash out after each shift. more pertinent to this story, the manager sat at dispatch at the end of every night to count the money. i never stopped to think when i was working there, what a bad situation that was...but that's a bad situation, dealing with all the money right there, at the unlocked door along drug dealer alley.

that's horrible and horrifying that it happened. i feel awful...someone died, someone who worked where i used to work. i feel bad that i keep relating it mentally to the fact that i used to work there, but it really could have just as easily been me, or anyone i knew there. i want to think where i worked for those five months was safe. clearly, it was not.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

survey, ganked from squelch84...*please* fill it out, it's shiny!!

1. name:
2. birthday:
3. place of residence:
4. what makes you happy:
5. what are you listening to now/have listened to last:
6. do you read my lj:
7. if you do, what is particularly good/bad about it:
8. an interesting fact about you:
9. are you in love/have a crush at the moment:
10. favorite place to be:
11. favorite lyric:
12. best time of the year:
13. Do you remember when we met?
14. Have I been a good friend to you?
15. Tell me something you've never told me before.

PLUS

1. one thing you like about me:
2. two things you like about yourself:
3. put this in your lj so i can tell you what i think of you.
4. post a picture you (if possible)

Monday, June 12, 2006

civ pro is out, and it's clear. law school is a lost cause, i'm embarrassed, and last semester was a fluke. goodbye.
all grades are supposed to be out today. my civ pro grade is still not up, which is not surprising since my civ pro prof, awesome as he may be, is also notoriously late turning in grades.

right now...i'm a strange mix of depressed, surprised, and confused. crim law and con law came out today. crim law was my favourite class, the one i loved, understood, and just plain got. con law was exactly the opposite: i didn't enjoy the subject matter, i found the prof rather unintelligible, and i just sorta checked out on that class.

i suffered a crushing defeat in crim.

and somehow, my con law grade was better than my crim law grade.

that's messed up.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

i adore saturday mornings. they're so relaxing...i have nowhere that i have to be, and i can do whatever i want, as slowly as i want.

sometimes i'm up early, like i was this morning. i lazed around and read my book, i made myself eggs for breakfast, i watched some bad tv, i played some poker. saturday mornings are my simple pleasure, my time to recharge on my own, and i wouldn't trade them for anything.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

OMG

WTF

RICKI LAKE ON TV TRYING TO BE PETER TOMARKEN?


i'm confused, but at least they are using the old style whammies. this is trippy...was i smoking crack without my own knowledge???

Gameshow Marathon is weird.

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

BOO HISS!!!

they yanked that hysterical shaw sucks page offline!! that makes me sad...i kept flipping back to it, and every time it had me in stitches!

it's not even on the wayback machine, i checked!

i'm going to go cry now. i should have saved a copy of that page on my computer before it got yanked offline...rest in peace. you were one of the funniest sites on the internet.

if i have two muffin, i give you muffin, mr. shaw sucks balls guy.
does someone you love have IED? next geraldo at large.

hahahahaha. when they gouge out some golfer's shoulder, you'll know.
it's official.

the charade is over, and i'm a worthless excuse for a law student.

they were all wrong about me, and i alone was right.

Monday, June 05, 2006

i am so excited. i am a blathering, jumping little schoolgirl.

metropolis st. louis, a young adult group here, has combined two of my signature geekeries: SCAVENGER HUNTS AND PUBLIC TRANSIT.

it's on saturday, june 24. teams of two have to find things and go places in st. louis. no cars, no bikes, nothing but walking, metrobus, and metrolink. it is a st. louis scavenger hunt on public transit.

i can't wait. it's going to be something fun, it's going to expose chris and me to different parts of st. louis, we'll get more familiar with the metrolink...and it's a PUBLIC TRANSIT SCAV HUNT!!!!!!

words fail to describe how unbelievably giddy i am about this.
one of the prisons in missouri has the zip code 64601.

whenever i type it, i always want to type 24601.

i also start hearing jean valjean, singing in my head.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

i've had a pretty nice, laid-back day...probably too laid-back, as there was some stuff that i should have done today, but didn't...but it was nice. i spent the earlier part of the day in the central west end...went to church this morning, which was really nice...i was looking oddly forward to going back there this week. i'm glad that i'll be in town for the coming weekends, since i like going there a lot. it's still kind of strange to think that i'm actually deciding to take part in a religious community, i'm still getting used to the idea that a religious community can be comfortable and thought-provoking without being dogmatic...sometimes i keep waiting for the "catch", the dogma, to pop up, and so far that hasn't happened, either when i've been at church or in all of the reading i've been doing, and am still doing, on unitarianism. i don't think i'm quite ready to say that i'm a unitarian yet, but i definitely feel my energy going in that direction.

afterwards, i went to the library since i had a ton of books to take back. i got some new ones...a couple of ann rule books i hadn't read (i still can't believe i haven't read all her books yet! i devour whatever of hers i can find!), a stupid mystery novel, and a book i've been intending to read for a long time and finally found in the library: "all families are psychotic" by douglas coupland. that book is so weird, but douglas coupland rocks. i think this book is even better than "life after god", the book of short stories of his that i read a while ago. the family portrayed in that book might be--gasp--even crazier than mine, or at least a different kind of crazy.

then i took a nap this afternoon. i love napping. i napped for a couple of hours when i got back from the library...and it was grand. did i mention how much i love naps?

Saturday, June 03, 2006

some of the most random things make me laugh so much.

like this picture i found on wikipedia. it's so hilariously eighties.



haha. roach motels.
holy crap! it's GORD FROM THUNDER BAY!!!

sadly, none of the photography involves pictures of his sister...you know, the one with the huge knockers.

and this is Gord from Saskatoon. what a hoser.
sigh.

i have until the end of the month to figure out where i'm living next year. my roommate's moving to her own place, so i'll either keep where i'm living now, or move out. it's all contingent on if i can find a roommate...one who can slap down eight hundred and fifty big ones on july first, to cover their half of the security deposit and their first month's rent. i put an ad up on craigslist, so maybe that will work.

or, i'll find another place to live. i've been looking around for that too. i think i have a better shot of that working out...although moving is going to be a pain in the butt, and i would really, really, really miss living next door to chris if i moved to another part of the city.

it would be so much easier if my roommate wasn't moving...or if i had more money to play around with. it's so hard to move when you're FLAT BROKE.
"you're not my best friend. your crotch is not my best friend."

that's right. MTV2 has been making me really, really happy. last night and this afternoon, they've been showing tom green reruns!

last night, they made me really happy. they showed my favourite episode ever! "undercutters pizza" is the best sketch ever. he chases a pizza guy, and tries to make them an unbaked pizza for cheaper. i had forgotten that two of my other tom green favourites, the bum bum song and the glenn likes his sister's boobies song, were also on that same episode. in other words, it's thirty minutes of pure hilarity.

i can't believe how old that show is...it's from when i was in high school, a good seven years ago or so. it makes me feel a little old, but i don't care...it's still just as funny as it used to be.

i hope this means that they'll be showing tom green reruns on a more regular basis.

also, in the way of Divine MTV Idiocy, Volume 2 of the beavis and butt-head collection is out. i need to get my hands on that at some point, somehow...it will probably be a while, since i'm so broke this summer it's absolutely embarrassing (aren't you supposed to be making money during the summer when you're in law school? i know, strange concept...), but eventually i will have those DVDs, because beavis and butt-head are genius.
no real content, as i'm half asleep. three things that made me laugh hysterically, as i'm half asleep.

hilarity number 1:



hilarity number 2:

if i had 2 muffin, i give Shaw muffin! (or, some dude who's really, really pissed at his craptastic internet service provider.)

hilarity number 3:

overheard in new york:
Crackhead: If my wife looked like you, I would stop smoking crack and get a job.
Businessgirl: Thanks.
--53rd & 7th

Friday, June 02, 2006

ho.
ly.
crap.

this comic made me fall on the floor.

i love pearls before swine.

generally, advice columns don't boil my blood. i nod along with advice i agree with, i shake my head at advice i think is pretty bad, and i giggle at advice that's just plain stupid. usually, i don't read an advice column that's just plain insulting.

the latest dear prudence? one of the bits of advice is plumb insulting:

Dear Prudence,
I will be getting married next year to the most wonderful man in the world. We share similar goals in life. One of those goals is that neither of us wants children. We are both in our 30s and don't want to be raising children into our late 50s. Our friends, family, and even acquaintances constantly ask us when we're going to start a family. When I respond that we don't want children, I get a lecture about how wonderful children are and how much I am missing. We both love children. We have plenty of nieces and nephews with whom we enjoy spending time. How do we head off those people who feel it is important to question our choices? One neighbor of mine suggested lying and telling them we are unable to have children (which will embarrass the asking party), but I am not one who can lie very well.

—No Child of Mine

Dear No,
As far as acquaintances are concerned, "I'd rather not discuss such a private matter" should do it. But family and friends are different. Yes, it's true that ultimately it's not anyone else's business, but from a human perspective this is a loss for both sets of parents. No one has parents who say, "I hope my child grows up to marry someone wonderful and they don't have children together." With your intimates, next time they bring it up, explain that you understand this is painful for them, but you are both comfortable with your decision and lecturing won't change your mind. Now I will join the chorus of people who are driving you crazy. You are about to get married, and as life's circumstances change, it is worth re-examining your goals, especially this one (and yes, I know, I am offending all happy childless people). You're only in your 30s—if you have children now, they'll be grown by the time you reach your late 50s! You say you love children, but as close as you may be to your nieces and nephews, that's no substitute for having your own. The people who know and love you best hope you and your husband have children—that alone makes it something worth considering.


at least she knows she's offending the childfree.

she's right about one thing: there's no substitute for having your own children. that's exactly the point--having nieces and nephews is not the same as having your own children. they don't want their own children. if having nieces or nephews were the same as having your own children, they would not want nieces or nephews either.

the last line is the most insulting. they should consider having kids because people they love are hoping they have kids? just because two people are good people doesn't mean they have any sort of responsibility to reproduce. it's not going to cancel out all of the stupid or mean people out there that are having kids. it's not going to make the nice people that don't want kids any happier or nicer, having to raise kids that they didn't want to have. if they reproduced for the sake of people other than themselves, they would become bitter, hateful creatures who resented the kids that others coerced them into having. there's a difference between buying a shirt that a loved one thinks looks good on them, and having a kid who's going to be a drain on their time, money, and emotions for the rest of their lives. one of those decisions is essentially inconsequential...they can buy the shirt for a few dollars, and stop wearing it if it doesn't grow on them. the kid...the kid, or at least the fallout from having the kid, is never going to go away.
the last hand of a sit-and-go, to the tune of "this land is your land"

these shinies are my shinies!
they are not your shinies!
i got dealt five high...
you got dealt seven high...
we both paired on the flop,
i rivered trip fives!
your shinies are belong to me!

Thursday, June 01, 2006

HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!

i had thought ADD broke up. turns out, they didn't disappear. i found their new website...and they are alive, well, and still rocking out!!!

*giddy dance*

they don't have any shows coming up in st. louis...although they are playing des moines tomorrow night. and, if they can travel from chicago to des moines...that means they can travel here at some point, too, right? right?

man, it sucks not being in chicago sometimes...and one of the reasons why is that i get so out of it with respect to the music scene. st. louis is just not the same in that regard.

still, though...ADD still exists! i swear, their song "maybe" (even though it's an oldie...from 2004 or so...) would definitely appear on a soundtrack of my first year of law school, if i made one. which gives me a good idea...i should compile a soundtrack of this year, now that i finally own a cd burner and all that jazz.

or, at least, i should burn it tomorrow, since tonight i still have plenty of cases to delve through while wearing my research assistant hat.
Anne Robinson: "What kind of pit viper is named for its noisemaking tail?"

Sheila E: "Cheetahs!"
sweet. :)

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