Thursday, September 15, 2005

so, i think i had my first law school go-crazy moment yesterday.

we were assigned a memo, and the professor basically told us that we have to write it without actually being told how to write it. it's not graded, we just get block points for turning in some sort of draft for the memo, but that just annoyed me on principle. this was our new teacher doing this...our old teacher gave us a really good idea of what we were supposed to do a few weeks ago before our first memo was due.

that precipitated insanity. that led to me thinking about how much work i have to do, how much reading i have to do this week, the fact that i haven't started my outline all felt like too much. it's the most freaked out i've ever been about work when i've actually been up to date on all the work i had to have done at the time. i don't know what it is.

maybe i'm just overcompensating. i was so apathetic in college...i didn't do any of my work, or any more than was necessary not to fail, my last two years of college. last year i was even more apathetic, because i didn't have a whole lot that i had to care about. i cared about what was fun, coaching mock trial and hanging out with my friends, but that was really it. now, i have to care about school again. i'm making myself care. sometimes it's easy, sometimes it's not. yesterday...i don't know if it wasn't easy to care, or wasn't easy to force myself to go through with it, because it really was feeling like a never-ending gauntlet of work. i'm starting to snap out of it a bit...although not completely, not yet.

alright, so this post made about as little sense as my nervous breakdown yesterday. i guess i'm just having a bad week.

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