Monday, December 15, 2003
i'm starting to have a profound dread of going to idaho...i wish i didn't have to go. i've had a bad enough time dealing with anything family-related over the last few months while i've been away, and now i'm going to have to stare it in the face and live among it for ten days. granted, it's not Pure Evil, or any real emissaries of Pure Evil (unless you count my brothers, who still get along with it, but i still wouldn't call them emissaries...). still, i'm tired of the entire arena. today is one of those days where i'm so tempted to wish i had witnessed some horrible crime and had to be put in witness protection. then again, if i went into witness protection, i'd lose my friends, my non-family life, as well, and that's a sacrifice that i'm not willing to make at all. i wouldn't want to give up the people i find dear, the people who are my closest support system, the people who hold me up amid the onslaught of the institution with whom i'm frustrated to have to share blood and ties.